FindChaos: The Official Blog of A. Stiffler

Professional illustrator, comic artist, graphic designer and avid birder. Stuff I draw and other nonsense.
Recent Tweets @


New episode. Here.

Further proving that this is one of the best series on the web ever.

ChaosLife: Tidy Tactic

It’s sound logic, imo.

Asker Anonymous Asks:
This is personal. You don't have to answer. But I'm curious. I've heard you and K (well more K) talk about your initial meeting etc, and it was such a sweet story and cool and made me wonder. Before K, were you dating girls? Did you have it all figured out yet, or were you still trying to figure out your sexuality? It's so unusual to see a couple that have been together from such a young age, and it's really nice. :-)
findchaos findchaos Said:

I was not dating girls! Of course, I wasn’t dating at all, so I don’t suppose it needs a gender qualifier. Before K, there was one long-distance relationship with a girl that went on for ages (to K’s lingering chagrin), but only because I never got around to saying “let’s not.” I’m sorry, I’m exactly that sort of aloof (and had no idea K had feelings for me — I thought she was too cool for that), so it’s probably a good thing I never inflicted myself upon the dating scene.

As for my sexuality before officially gettin’ with K, I had no idea, I didn’t really think about it. I had ambitions of being a priest or a monk until I found out many orders had a thing against vaginas and agnosticism. I avoided the idea of sex from an early age because the very little I almost experimented in it (my subtle way of saying masturbation) was almost immediately squashed by shame and embarrassment. You know that mandatory time a parent catches you doing it? Now imagine that, except minus any explanation, mutual understanding, or even backing out of the room. Just: “don’t do that!” End of story. Life confused FOR A LONG TIME. I was honestly convinced I was the inventor of something new and vile, and up until this point, I had no idea I was the fucking Marquis de Sade at age 5. (Before anyone asks, no, I wasn’t even fantasizing about people or sex. I’m pretty sure it had something to do with non-humanoid robots. Huh.)

For clarification’s sake, I would like to point out the lack-of-sex-talk/approval wasn’t from any religious standpoint, my whole family is just constantly embarrassed of everything and pretend the private intricacies of each other’s lives just don’t happen. We make small talk.

Anywho, the entire gist of that TMI is that sex was so far from my mind that I didn’t bother with sorting out which gender I found attractive or why. When I met K, it just clicked and I was madly attracted to her. I haven’t felt that way about anyone else, I don’t ogle one set of bodies more than another, so I guess the full depths of my sexuality remain a mystery, even to me.

Moral of the Story: Don’t assume your kids know shit about sex. Now they think they’re perverted supervillains. Good job, parenting.

It’s beautiful outside and WRONG.





FindChaos: Unkindness, Page 20

A friend in need…

NEVER promise anything, Mary! Negotiations 101, homes. Now you’re gonna be missing a kidney…

I feel like somewhere in Mary’s bag there’s an Employee Handbook from C.E., with a detailed list of things not to do, and this is right at the top. And an addendum that says “Kidney loss not covered under Medical.”


You know, unless she’s into that. 

Reblogging for the daytime crowd! And the awesome (cheeky, ha!) accompanying artwork by Alex. <3

FindChaos: Unkindness, Page 20

A friend in need…

An oldie but a goodie: a photo of Peter since Konstantin has been getting all the press. Super-Derp, Activate!

Konstantin helps K prep the window gardens for Spring, though he’s currently on his break.


this may be one of the greatest headlines I’ve ever read

(via fat-birds)

Guess who thought he could crawl through a sweater sleeve?